Opposite Gender Issues

Writing this will do no good for the church. But because I can’t resolve this issue myself, I am writing to ask for fellowship. I cannot disclose my name, or openly have fellowship with servants at the church. I am a brother from Daejon and I can’t get one sister from my region out of my mind. What should I do?

I simply like her, but I don’t think I should continue to have this kind of heart. Nevertheless, I don’t have any power to control myself. 

  I give my regards in the name of the Lord. 

After reading your title, “Opposite Gender Issues,” I thought about how fortunate we are to have this homepage. I feel that we must have been concerned or worried about these kinds of issues at least once in our lives. We are so fortunate that the homepage allows us to openly talk about these embarrassing topics at times of hesitation. Actually, I wanted to reply to your message as soon as I read it, but I apologize for being late. God created Adam and gave to him a spouse, Eve, saying, “It is not good that man should be alone…” He not only gave him Eve, but a heart to love her. Every work of God toward men is not by law, but by heart.

For example, when we serve God, He is not pleased when we do it by law. Therefore He made us, who are born again, to serve Him with the heart of Jesus. He has also given parents a heart to love their children so that they may raise them with their hearts rather than by law. Likewise, when God gave men women to build families and have children, He gave them a heart to love women so that they could naturally marry their wife rather than making it a law that men should marry women. Therefore, it is only natural and normal that we become interested in the opposite gender and have the heart to love one another. In other words, it is truly divine and beautiful for a man to grow and find a wife to start a family. However, the thing we must be careful about is the reality of how Satan turns over the divine work of God and shifts the path toward sin.

A man and a woman loving each other and having children is the order of the holy God’s providence that Satan has destroyed and turned into sin. He has changed this beautiful providence of God into something disgraceful and filthy. That is why unspeakable evils such as adultery, lechery, rape, divorce, single mothers, and out-of-wedlock births have abounded. This is the reason that the church follows the words in the Bible to guide the marriage of one man and one woman to fulfill beautiful families. God, who gave you the heart to love the opposite gender, has prepared you a sister so that you don’t mindlessly love any woman and commit promiscuous sins. Now with the heart of patience and discretion, you must pray to God to show you that bride he has prepared. When you are sure that he has showed her to you, you should go to your parents and pastor to seek consultation. Once confident that she is the spouse God has allowed, you should love and marry her to create a beautiful family.

How many cases are there where precious families given by God are broken resulting in children becoming orphans and reared without family, to be thrown away on the streets, and only used in unfortunate crimes? I believe that God will pour grace upon you, His child, so that you will not be handed over to Satan to pursue after your sexual desires and become a tool of sin. He will also help you to pray with patience so that you can create a beautiful household. I hope that you will receive that beautiful and lovely family. Lastly, I thank the Lord for allowing the brothers and sisters of our church to form families by the providence of God and for enjoying their peaceful families which many people in the world cannot imagine having.

I will pray for you, brother.